


That Your Eyes Might Be Shining For Me

by wordslinging



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Older Woman/Younger Man, Romance, Surprise OTPs I Did Not See Coming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-17
Updated: 2016-01-17
Packaged: 2018-05-14 13:24:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5745478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordslinging/pseuds/wordslinging
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The thing is, he's been in love with her as long as he can remember. He just never expected anything to happen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	That Your Eyes Might Be Shining For Me

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a tfa_kink prompt: "Poe reminds Leia of a combination of young Han and young Luke and can't help but be drawn to him. Poe worships the ground she walks on."
> 
> Guess who did NOT walk out of the theater expecting to wind up shipping Poe/Leia like gangbusters it's meeeeeee.

General Organa doesn't usually join the younger members of the Resistance during downtime, which suits everyone--it can be hard to relax and enjoy a drink or a candid conversation with the General five feet away, and she's confided to Poe that she doesn't exactly enjoy sitting there feeling like some kind of babysitter or chaperone, either. But there are always exceptions, and a week like the one they've just had--a stand-off on an Outer Rim world, civilian casualties kept to a minimum through a combination of skill and luck, and finally, once the bystanders were all out of harm's way, a battle as swift and decisive as the days leading up to it had been tense and drawn-out--calls for an exception. They've given the First Order another black eye, their own casualties were small, and they're all still high on the victory, so when Leia finds her troops at what seems to be the only halfway-decent bar on this side of the planet and declares she's buying the next round, Poe's "Only if you stay and have one with us, General" is met with enthusiastic cheers.

Several drinks later, the two of them are at a table with Finn, Snap, and Lieutenant Connix. Leia's not drunk--Poe's never seen her drunk, he's not sure she gets drunk, she's probably got some ability to process alcohol faster than mere mortals--but her eyes are bright and her posture is relaxed and at some point she put a hand on his arm for emphasis and left it there. 

Poe and Snap are telling the story of that time back in their Republic days when they stumbled onto a pirate band in the middle of a completely unrelated mission. If Poe's honest, he's bragging a little, which he figures being the best pilot in the Resistance earns him the right to do now and then. He's working up to the story's climax when he catches sight of Leia's face--she's still smiling, but there's a sad, faraway look in her eyes. She catches his eyes on her and looks away quickly, and Poe's voice falters as he finishes the story.

Snap gets up to fetch another round of drinks, and Leia holds up a hand. 

"I'm done for the night." There's a hint of unsteadiness as she gets to her feet, quickly hidden as she grabs the edge of the table and then puts her hand on Poe's arm again. "You, walk me back to where we're staying. The rest of you, enjoy yourselves."

They walk quietly, and they're almost back to the makeshift barracks when Poe speaks up. 

"General, did I say something to upset you back there?"

"No," she says quickly. "No, just..." She stops walking and turns to face him with a wry smile and that sadness back in her eyes. "Sometimes you remind me so much of Han."

"I'm sorry," Poe says at once, because fuck, there are tears in her eyes and his brain is screaming YOU UPSET THE GENERAL like an alarm klaxon. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to--"

She shakes her head, touching his arm again. "Poe, I couldn't get away from his memory if I wanted to, and I _don't_ want to. It's all right."

He smiles and puts a hand over hers. "Well, in that case, thank you. It's an honor to be compared to him."

Leia raises her other hand to his cheek, her smile turning fond. "The galaxy needs people like him. I'm glad it has you."

Poe doesn't remember making a conscious decision to kiss her. One second he's looking into her eyes, and the next he's leaning forward with her face cupped in his hands and his mouth on hers and every part of him screaming in panic and exhilaration at the same time. Then she's kissing him back, her hand sliding around to cup the back of his head, and exhilaration surges ahead for a moment before she pushes him away and panic wins out.

He kissed the General. He. Kissed the General. _He kissed the General._

"I'm sorry, General, that was so out of line, I--" he starts babbling, before she stops him with two fingers against his lips.

"I'm the one who should be sorry, Poe."

"You--wait, what?" For a second he wonders if he heard her wrong--he probably should have cut himself off a drink or two ago, and his heart is hammering in his ears.

Leia raises her eyebrows slightly. "Last I checked, I'm the superior officer here. _And_ old enough to be your mother--who, by the way, was a friend of mine."

Poe shakes his head, stepping closer and looking at her intently, because if _that's_ why she pushed him away this is all wrong. "I don't care."

Her eyebrows go up further. "You don't care?"

"I mean, I don't care that you're my superior or that you're older," he clarifies. "I _do_ care that I'd rather throw myself into a Sarlacc pit than upset or offend you."

She snorts, putting a hand on his chest. "Kid, it's going to take a bit more than one kiss from you to upset or offend me."

"Okay. Good." He pauses, then leans in further and adds hopefully, "...Does that mean I can kiss you again?"

Leia shoves him away, but not hard. " _No_ , because I'm still your superior officer and it's my job to care about that even if you don't."

Poe steps back, looking down to try and hide his disappointment. "Right. Okay."

Leia sighs and puts her hand on his shoulder. "Go get some sleep, you probably need it as much as I do. And thank you."

"Thank you?" he echoes, looking up at her, and she gives him a crooked smile. 

"It's nice for a woman of a certain age to know an attractive young man wants to kiss her." Before Poe can say anything, she holds up a finger. "Which is not an invitation to try again."

He nods, smiling. "Got it. And...you're welcome. Good night, ma'am."

***

They don't talk about it after that, which, for Poe, is not the same as not thinking about it.

The thing is, he's been in love with her as long as he can remember. He just never expected anything to happen, and now that it has his mind and heart are on fire with things he didn't think were possibilities. 

But if Leia doesn't want anything else to happen, he's just going to have to resign himself to a life of silent pining. He's definitely not going to let it affect their working relationship. It's always been a point of pride that General Organa knows she can rely on him, so he's going to keep being reliable and not bring up the kiss.

Then they lose contact with the Millennium Falcon during a mission. Luke and Rey and Chewie are aboard with a Star Destroyer and a squadron of TIEs behind them, trying to stay ahead of their pursuers until they get the coordinates they need to jump to hyperspace. Leia's at her command post relaying information and even joking with Luke and Chewie over the comms, she's in control, she's _fine_ , and then there's the muffled sound of an impact, a shout from Rey and a distressed roar from Chewie, and Luke's voice crackles and breaks up into nothing but static. 

Leia stays where she is, repeating Luke's name until it's clear he's not going to answer, then calmly asks to be informed the moment there's any news and walks away. 

Poe hesitates briefly, then goes after her. "General, can I do anything?"

She stands with her back to him, arms folded, and her voice is thick when she answers. "No. Thank you, Poe, I'm all right."

He moves to stand next to her, trying to get her to meet his eyes. "All due respect, ma'am, I'm not sure that's true." She doesn't say anything, and he touches her shoulder lightly. "Leia."

He's never called her by her first name before, always _princess_ or _your highness_ or _general_ or _ma'am_. She looks up at him, and for just a second she lets it show how worried she is, how scared of losing even more than the unbelievable amount she already has. 

Poe steps closer, putting his arms around her. She leans into him, her head on his shoulder, and Poe closes his eyes and rests his cheek against her hair.

"They'll be all right," he says in a low voice. "They'll take care of each other, and trust in the Force, and come home. We have to have faith in that."

"You're good at that," she replies, the words muffled against his jacket. "The having faith part."

He smiles. "Who do you think I learned it from?"

Leia pulls back to look at him, putting her hands on his shoulders. "I used to be good at it. Now...mind if I leave that part to you for a little while?"

Poe takes hold of her upper arms and leans forward until their foreheads touch. "They'll be all right," he says again, firmly. "They'll be all right, Leia."

She tilts her head up, so that her nose brushes his and he can feel her breath on his face. Poe closes his eyes as the moment stretches out, the not-kiss hanging between them like an unspoken word.

"You sure about this?" she asks. 

"Sure as I've ever been," he replies with no hesitation, and then her mouth is on his.

It's not just a single kiss, this time. Poe tugs her back into his arms and Leia brings her hands up to frame his face and it's several minutes before she pulls back again.

"If I tell you I don't want to be alone tonight..." she begins.

"Whatever you want," Poe tells her, low and urgent. "Just tell me what you need from me."

Behind him there are footsteps and a deliberate throat-clearing, and they step apart and turn to see Connix standing there, her professionalism too well-ingrained to show any reaction to finding them like this.

"Excuse me, General, but we've reestablished contact with the Falcon. They're all right."

Leia closes her eyes for a moment, and Poe hears the quiet breath she lets out. "Where are they?" 

"Lying low at an old smuggler's hideout near Lothal," Connix tells her. "Admiral Statura suggested we send a squadron to rendezvou and escort them back here."

Leia nods. "Tell him I'll be there in a second." Connix goes, and Leia turns to Poe, putting her hand on his chest. "You want to know what you can do for me? Go bring them home."

Poe nods instantly. "Already on my way, General."

***

They find the Falcon, and then the TIEs find them. Fortunately it's not the whole squadron, which likely split up to search for their target along a few possible routes. Things only get dicey for a minute or two when Snap has one on his tail--Poe's on his way to help, but the Falcon gets there first and takes the TIE out with one well-placed shot.

"Whoever's on guns in there, nice work," Poe says over his comms.

"Thanks," a calm voice replies. "Wasn't sure I'd still remember how to work this thing."

"...General Skywalker?" Poe does not freak out, because when you're piloting an X-Wing in open space you don't freak out no matter what happens.

"Commander Dameron," Luke replies cordially. "Rey and Chewie have been doing all the hard work, I figured I should make myself useful."

They jump back to light speed and make it back to the base without further incident. Leia meets them on the tarmac, grabbing both Luke and Rey in tight one-armed hugs. When she lets them go, she turns to Poe, wraps a hand around one of the straps of his flight suit, and pulls him into a kiss.

After a moment of surprised stillness, Poe reaches up to cup the back of her head, leaning into the kiss. Dimly, he hears a surprised, delighted laugh from Rey and an assortment of whoops and cheers from others, but it's hard to focus on anything but Leia right now.

She pulls back, touches his cheek with a smile, and then turns back toward Luke, who's regarding her with immense fondness. Poe stands there, feeling slightly dazed, until Snap walks past him laughing and shaking his head. 

"Man, you should see your face right now."

There are still things to be done--there's always more to be done--but at some point Poe's standing next to Leia and she says in a low voice "Find me later?" and he nods, and what seems like five years later he's in her quarters, suddenly feeling like an awkward, inexperienced kid.

"I probably shouldn't have done that earlier," Leia says, looking apologetic as she comes to stand in front of him. "Kissed you in front of everyone, that is."

Poe smiles and reaches out, hands settling on her waist. He knows she'll stop him if he oversteps, and the confidence that gives him to just reach out and touch her is exhilarating. "I didn't mind."

Leia puts her hands on his chest, looking up at him with a slight smirk. "You're not worried about people thinking I'm showing you favoritism? That you got where you are by sleeping with the General?"

Poe tugs her a little closer, looking her in the eyes with utter seriousness. "Anyone who knows you knows you wouldn't do that, and anyone who knows me knows I earned my rank."

"You really don't have any doubts about this, do you?" Leia asks, searching his face.

Poe twists his mouth to one side. "I'm not really sure how my dad's going to take this, if he ever finds out?"

Leia groans and drops her forehead against his shoulder. "You had to bring that up, didn't you?"

Poe chuckles and kisses the top of her head. "Sorry. Did I kill the mood?"

In reply, Leia lifts her head and kisses him. Poe opens his mouth to hers and lets her back him towards the bed, his pulse racing just as hard as it ever has behind the controls of a ship.

Leia, it turns out, can be as efficient in the bedroom as she is in the command center, and gets them both undressed and on the bed in short order. Poe lies on his back as she kneels over him, that dazed feeling coming back.

She pauses with her hands on his shoulders. "You okay there, Dameron?"

"Yeah, just--" he takes hold of her waist again, looking up at her in wonder. "This is happening."

"It is," she says, smiling. "Still with me?"

Poe wraps his arms more firmly around her and stretches up to kiss her. She shifts against him, straddling his lap and sinking down, and they both gasp against each other's mouths.

" _Leia_ ," Poe breathes out as they move together, soft and fervent.

She lifts her hands to his hair, stroking it back from his face. "I like how you say that," she tells him.

"Leia," he says again, skimming his mouth down the side of her neck. "Leia, Leia." 

He holds her close with one arm and brings his other hand up to cup one of her breasts, alternating kisses and murmurs against her skin. Leia's hands tighten in his hair as she rides him, her movements strong and sure.

Poe tips his head back to look at her and she strokes his cheek, thumb pressing against his lower lip. 

"Will you take your hair down?" he asks, and Leia smiles and reaches up. Unpinned from the crown she wears it in, it tumbles down her shoulder in one long twist, still soft and thick for all the gray mixed in with the brown. Poe buries his face in it for a moment, inhaling deeply, until she touches his cheek and pulls him up into a fierce kiss.

She comes first, tightening her legs around him and crying out softly, and Poe's right behind her, pushing his face into the curve of her neck and holding on for dear life.

They lie side by side afterward, and Leia nestles against his shoulder with her arm draped over his chest. "Stay?"

Poe puts his hand over hers where it covers his heart. "As long as you want me to."

***

He does slip out early the next morning, running down to the mess hall while Leia's in the shower. It doesn't take long for it to become apparent that a) _everyone_ knows about the kiss on the tarmac and him spending the night in the General's quarters, b) any teasing he gets is going to be gentle and good-natured, out of everyone's respect for Leia if nothing else, and c) getting breakfast for the General is an excellent excuse to cut in line.

He carries a tray back to her quarters and finds her dressed and fixing her hair. "There you are," she says. "Come help me with this."

Poe sets the tray down on a desk and walks over, holding where she points so she can use both hands to tuck and pin. 

"I brought breakfast," he says as she finishes up.

"Thanks, but I'm fine," Leia says, ignoring the tray as she walks over to the desk and picks up a datapad.

"You should eat something," Poe says, retrieving a mug of caf from the tray for himself and leaning one hip against the edge of the desk. "My mom always told me, never try to save the galaxy on an empty stomach. Which I'm pretty sure was something she just came up with to get me to eat my vegetables, but it's sound advice."

"You don't have to do that," she says, unsmiling, and Poe falters.

"Do what?" 

"Take care of me," Leia replies, looking at him solemnly. "I appreciate the thought, but I don't expect it and I don't need it."

"I know," Poe tells her, equally solemn. "Trust me, I know."

Their eyes hold for a moment, and then Leia softens, gives him a wry smile, and reaches for the other mug of caf. Poe tries not to look too pleased with himself.

Leia turns her attention back to the datapad as she eats, but Poe doesn't get any sense that she minds his nearness, and feels like she'd definitely make it known if she did. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean he can stay here indefinitely.

"I should probably go get ready for morning briefing," he says, and at that she sets the datapad down and turns toward him, putting her hand on his shoulder and stretching up for a lingering kiss. Poe frames her face in his hands and thinks about how he could quite happily spend every morning like this for the rest of his life or until she decides she doesn't want him anymore, whichever comes first.

"I'll see you later," she says as she draws back.

Poe nods, giving her his best dashing pilot smile as he heads for the door. "You know where I'll be."


End file.
